Monday, October 18, 2010
Natalie Katherina--Story and Thoughts.
to find her place in this world. There isn't anything really worth
mentioning about me, i'm stubborn sometimes, I mess things up. I fall
down sometimes. And sometimes all I can do is cry.
My name is Natalie Katherina, and this is my story. or more
specifically, a chapter in the story of my life.
My story isn't over yet, in fact, it is just starting to begin. A new
chapter unfolds every day, and there's always something unexpected
hidden among the pages.
I haven't been through any kind of terrible tragedy. I haven't had my
whole world turned upside down by an event in my life shattering it's
way into my existance.
I've lived and I've learned. I've made mistakes, I've been heartbroken.
I've thought I was in love, only to be left wondering what love really
is.
I don't take any credit to what I've become. Yes, I've had to work at
building my character, and yes, I've gone through things that made me
stronger, things that at the time I wished I never had to go through.
But ultimutely what got me here was the Grace of my Savior.
I don't always trust him like I should. I have to remind myself that
it's not all about me. About how small and insignificant I really am.
When it comes down to it, I really don't mean a thing. But He died for
me. So that being said, I want to LIVE for Him. He has put people in
my life who I couldn't be more blessed by. I couldn't ask for anything
more. although there are things I wish I didn't have to go through, I
know it's all a part of his plan. He works everything out for Good.
I am here to let you know that your story is beautiful and one of a
kind. It is a struggle sometimes, but there are pages ahead that will
take your breath away. Hold on through the hard times, and when you
finally reach those beautiful chapters, you will be so glad you held
on. I know I am.
I just want you to know you are not alone. You are loved more than you
can immagine and you are surrounded by people who want to lift you up
when you fall.
reach out to them, and don't give up.
that's what operation outkast is about, spreading hope and love,
spreading Christ. It's about the people around us, and the ones who
need a hand to hold. it's about making a difference in this darkened
world. Being a voice in the silence, and a movement in stillness.
Wake up the sleeping generation around you and take action!
Please talk to us here at Operation Outkast. Let us know what is going
on in your life. We care about you and we are here to listen, help,
reach out, and pray for you.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Letters To God
in my life. I love you so much!
Dear God, why did you make me this way?
DID YOU TAKE EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME? WHY GOD, WHY?!?
Dear God, You're in control. I see how you have worked everything
together for good. What happened, was all part of your plan, and the
pain I went through was to bring me closer to you. And God, through
that, I am able to relate to different people more. God, thank you for
being in control.
Dear God, why can't people see my pain?
Dear God, I SCREWED UP AND CAN NEVER BE FORGIVEN. I BLEW IT! God, I
totally messed up. How can you even look at me and say you love me? I
am so horrible. How can you love me? HOW?
Dear God, I love you and I'm so sorry for everything I've done. God,
I'm broken now, and I need you to help me. I can't do this alone.
Dear God, why can't I be like them? why do I feel so worthless?
Dear God, I understand now..
God says "Youre forgiven. I love you."
God says "I created you, and you are perfect. I love you."
God says "no one is good enough. but I work through you and acomplish
great things through you. I love you"
God says "I created you as YOU. and you're the only YOU. that will
EVER live. you are perfect in my sight. I love you."
God says "my grace is sufficiant for you, and I will be your strength.
in your weakness my strength is made perfect. I love you"
he says "I am in control and I know what's best for you. I see the big
picture. sometimes I say no because I know it will hurt you if I say
yes. I love you."
We often write these kind of letters to God.
it depends on the day. it depends on the situation. we question God.
we yell at God. We laugh at God.
we are angry at him again.
and he Always says "I love you."
no matter what we are saying to him. he replies back in a still quiet
voice "I love you"
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Thoughts.. people FAIL..
around them, our lives around them. We wrap our hearts around them,
and arms around them. It seems like people are the reason for things
we do. Like they are the reason we are living. The reason for our
happiness.
But in truth, I will tell you what people are. You may not like to
hear it, but here it is. People are FAILURES. If we are constantly
looking to someone else to fufill us, we are going to be disappointed.
They will always come short, because one person cannot be everything.
They can't possibly have enough energy to be there for others and help
themselves as well ALL the time. Now, am I saying that since people
are obviously going to fail us at one point or another, we shoudlnt
reach out to them? No. I'm not saying that. People are wonderful.
Friends are amazing to have. That one person you can talk to about
anything, who is there for you when things get hard. That's so awesome.
but if we look to people to fufill us, we are going to be sold short.
So this creates a problem. If people fail.. what are we supposed to
do? we can depend on eachother only so much before things start to
pressurize and it becomes to the point of suffocation..
There's someone who doesn't fail.
and someone who is always always always there.
and sometimes he will make himself known through other people. he uses
the the people around you to help
you through stuff.
But he wants you to reconize him as being the ultimute source of life
and happiness.
HE is the reason we live. and he is the only one who can make us
complete.
He created people to love, and be loved. He gives us friends to help
us through hard times. But ultimutely he is the one we should turn to.
He loves us more than any other human could.
because he is the creator of the heavens and the earth. Because he
knows us, he knew us before we were born. becuase he DIED for us. and
he tells us that he will never leave us, or forsake us.
he's right there, but so many people reject his love. they look to
people and for a while, it's enough. but over time, without God, it
doesn't work. it fails us.
God has so much more planned for our lives, if we choose to follow him.
rejecting him is like walking up to the cross, and looking up at
Christ, who is bleeding, suffereing, crying out in anguish. It's like
standing there, and saying "this isn't enough. forgiveness isn't
enough. Christs death isn't enough."
so what is enough?
Sunday, September 26, 2010
In Focus
"But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how is it that you turn back again to the weak and worthless elemental things, to which you desire to be enslaved all over again?" Galations 4:9
This could be spread out into a million different lessons, but when I read it...I thought about how easily my emotions get run over by silly, petty things. I don't even think about it. I just let it control me, my thoughts, what I talk about. I too often meditate on MY problems, when in reality, they're not problems at all. They're just...dumb. Situations like the dog waking me up too early, realizing there's a stain on my white shirt, not getting my coffee fix in the morning, having heart strings pulled at, etc. The list goes on and on.
How many times do I wake up in the morning and say, "I wonder how I can help/encourage/comfort someone who's in the midst a problem?" What do you think? What kind of friend are you? Can you spot when your fellow brother or sister is in need? Do you even ask?
In Job 2:11-13, Job's friends initiated a leave-home-and-go-comfort-Job-even-if-it-takes-a-whole-week visit. When they saw Job...he was barely recognizable. His whole body was covered in sores and blood (reminds me of a certain Yeshua.) They began weeping and tearing their clothes, and they sat with Job for seven days and nights in moral support.
And we can't cut out a couple hours or even minutes to surround someone with love and compassion?
When we loose sight of how much God loves us and what Jesus Christ did for us, we forget the love and compassion He had on us. And if we forget His love and compassion, we have no desire to share it with others.
Stay in focus.
Erin
Monday, September 13, 2010
The Power of a Word (just some thoughts)
Looking at this statement, you may think I'm crazy. Theyre just words, right? They cant cause physical pain. They are invisible in a sense. They arent something solid, something we can touch.
But they are.
They can cut deeper than any knife, and they can heal. They can break down, and build up.
People dont often see this. They dont realize how powerful words can be. So they say whatever.
Words leave scars that dont go away.
You can choose how you react to the words spoken to you, but you cant control what people say.
But why dont you start using your words to build up, to encourage.
The change could start with you.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Why Does God do this to me?
~~~
When it seems like you're going through too much; when it seems like God has put out too much to handle; remember, He has a plan.
He will never leave you nor forsake you. He loves you. Truly loves you.
Not the love your boyfriend gives you. Or the love anybody gives you. True love.
He will never leave your side, cuz He has a plan for you.
He's always in control. Always. Nothing surprises God, He never says oops. He knows everything.
So trust Him. You trust people who don't know what's going to happen, why not He who does?
~~
Job wondered the same thing. He followed God to a T. He lived a holy life.
But tragedy fell. He persevered and followed God and was rewarded.
But why him? He asked, too. He even asked God. Yup, God Himself. What did I do? Why? I follow you!
God replied, "I am in control. Who made all of this earth? Who controls the dinosaur? Who is more powerful, you or me?"
People say God never answers Job in a good way. I think He gave a perfect answer. Because he is in control. That is why it happens.
He has a plan for you. Its bigger and better than you can imagine, you just can't see it yet. But remember:
HE is in control. Not you. Not your mom, your friends, whomever. HE is.
And He knows what He is doing. He is making you stronger. He uses your pain, your joy, every experience to make you who you are and will be.
So next time, don't ask, "why me?"
Say, "I know you are in control. Use this experience."
Job 11:18
Job 11:18 NIV
Erin: Hope is why I'm here
That's what human's strive for, right? Hope. We may not think about it, but that's why we get up every morning. It drives us. We want there to be something bigger out there. We want something to live for.
As Christians, we place our hope in Jesus Christ. He came to save and he came to serve; but he also came and died on a cross so that everyone (as in EVERYONE) could have the opportunity to receive his gift of hope...the hope that isn't just "waiting for a better tomorrow." Instead, it's the kind of hope that is "knowing there WILL be a better tomorrow."
Now, I'm not saying that everyday will be better than the last. We live in a world scarred by sin, so there are obviously going to be some things that hit hard...whether that's divorce, death of a loved one, murder, deception, hypocrisy, you name it. There's a ton of crap that happens. You know that.
But amongst all this chaos, where do we turn?
Jesus Christ.
When we're hurt, what do we run to?
God's love.
It's simple. There's a purpose to life. There's true hope. God sent Jesus Christ to take the death penalty that we deserve. We are the ones sinning everyday. Jesus did nothing wrong...but he loved us so much, he chose to die. But then where's the hope you ask? It's in the fact that he defeated death. He rose again. Our Savior is powerful enough to triumph over the one thing we can never conquer, and because we know he is alive with the Lord, we have hope in his return.
Jesus gives us a peace that is comforting and a love that is infinite. He is the truth that has set us free and given us hope.
Don't forget that you have this gift. And for those of you who don't: we want to help you attain this gift. Why are you here? What's your goal? What do you live for? What's your story? Tell us yours, we'll tell you ours. We wanna listen, because we know you are worth so much and are loved more than you will ever understand.
Taking the First Step
Did you know that you are surrounded by people who feel lonely every day?
Did you know that most people when they are hurting (for whatever reason) will not right out tell you that they are in pain and need someone to talk to.
YOU have to take the first step and reach out to them. Let them know you care. Listen to them, love them. Eventually they may come to you when they need someone. Or they may not, it just depends.
you just have to be ready to be there, to love.
You could just save a life.
Look for the lonely, the brokenhearted, the hurting.
Take the time to help heal their wounds, the joy from helping other people is indescribable.
seeing someone smile and knowing you helped put that smile on their face is an amazing thing.
So this coming week, take that first step. Maybe just smile at someone who seems to be having a bad day. Sit with someone who is sitting alone.
Listen to someone.
Love someone.
Give someone a hug, even if they dont ask for it.
Take the first step, and together we can take steps to a better community, to a better world.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
My Wish For You
i wish for you to love the life you live, and live the life you love.
Friday, August 27, 2010
a quote for thought
Thursday, August 26, 2010
just different thoughts..
so big, why would he care about me?"
have you ever considered the fact that you are engraven into the palms
of his hands?
Jesus paid the ultimute love sacrifice for you, by dying on the cross.
And the nails that pierced his hands, the pain he went through. It was
for YOU.
and the scars that remain there, they are your name. they are you.
He sees them, and he says "I did this for YOU." YOU! he died for the
whole world. and he died for me. he died for the guy who lives three
houses away from you. died for the president of the United States.
he died for everyone.
and all of our names, are engraven in love on the palms of His hands.
I don't mean literally. it doesn't literally say "Natalie" on his palm.
but the scar is there that he was given on your behalf. on my behalf.
out of love.
and not only did Jesus die for us, but he also lives for us.
he is victorious over death.
and he died so that we might have life. so our lives would have a
PURPOSE.
he died for us. so why don't we live for him?
happiness
unhappy? why isn't God giving me what I know will make me happy?"
anything we can begin to comprehend.
So when we say we know what will make us happy, do we really? Do we
really know what will make our lives complete? we may think we do. But
when it comes down to it, we don't.
God knows us better than we know ourselves. He CREATED US. and he
loves us more than we can immagine. He has a PERFECT plan for our
lives. And he's the only one who can give us true happiness. God
DEFINES happiness. God CREATED happiness. A life lived for him is what
makes our existance worthwhile. He is the ONLY one who can fill that
void.
yeah, that emptiness, I know you know what I'm talking about. it's
that hole inside you that you try to fill but nothing seems to fill it.
Because those things aren't God, the only thing that can truely fufill
us.
He will give us joy that OVERFLOWS. if we follow him and are willing
to do what he wants us to.
He wants us to love others, to live our lives serving him and letting
people know what he has done for us.
he DIED for us. So why don't we LIVE for him.
we miss out on so much joy when we go our own way.
God DEFINES happiness.
and when our minds are in sync with him, we will be desiring what he
desires for our lives and we will ask him and he will give us happiness.
So let's refoucus here, let's take a look and see where our sights are.
Are you OVERFLOWING with Gods joy? are you trusting him? are you
loving him?
are you complete in him?
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Letters To God
in my life. I love you so much!
Dear God, why did you make me this way?
DID YOU TAKE EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME? WHY GOD, WHY?!?
Dear God, You're in control. I see how you have worked everything
together for good. What happened, was all part of your plan, and the
pain I went through was to bring me closer to you. And God, through
that, I am able to relate to different people more. God, thank you for
being in control.
Dear God, why can't people see my pain?
Dear God, I SCREWED UP AND CAN NEVER BE FORGIVEN. I BLEW IT! God, I
totally messed up. How can you even look at me and say you love me? I
am so horrible. How can you love me? HOW?
Dear God, I love you and I'm so sorry for everything I've done. God,
I'm broken now, and I need you to help me. I can't do this alone.
Dear God, why can't I be like them? why do I feel so worthless?
Dear God, I understand now..
God says "Youre forgiven. I love you."
God says "I created you, and you are perfect. I love you."
God says "no one is good enough. but I work through you and acomplish
great things through you. I love you"
God says "I created you as YOU. and you're the only YOU. that will
EVER live. you are perfect in my sight. I love you."
God says "my grace is sufficiant for you, and I will be your strength.
in your weakness my strength is made perfect. I love you"
he says "I am in control and I know what's best for you. I see the big
picture. sometimes I say no because I know it will hurt you if I say
yes. I love you."
We often write these kind of letters to God.
it depends on the day. it depends on the situation. we question God.
we yell at God. We laugh at God.
we are angry at him again.
and he Always says "I love you."
no matter what we are saying to him. he replies back in a still quiet
voice "I love you"
Here We Collide
love, the one moment today that was worth hanging on to, a
conversation you want to remember, something you want to do tommorrow,
a list of places you would like to see. Something that is beautiful in
the middle of the chaos. Write it down because it is real."- Here We
Collide.
Charge to Christians
So why are we the exact opposite? Why do we only sit with our friends? Why don't we ever leave our comfort zone? Why do we leave the lonely desperate? They look for love outside of God when we don't show them to Him. Aren't we supposed to live like Christ?
Come Alive By Barlowgirl
Never shut up it's our turn to speak out
These streets are dead just waiting to come alive
Break down the doors of our comfortable room
Tear down the walls we never could see through
Aren't we sick yet of missing out on life
Do we want more?
Tell me do we want more?
'Cause we've heard the cry and we'll come alive
And we fight for love and we live to die
Because a life that holds no meaning
Is like a day without the light
So we'll come alive tonight
All have the call but so few have listened
Life is too short you don't want to miss this
Make up your mind before life passes by
Now is the time to wake up and see this
World won't revolve around you and me
So let's be the change we've all been waiting for
We are the passion
We are the movement
We are the fire
We'll never lose it
Waking Up
alone. Release your high hopes, and they'll survive. Cuz this is the
future. And you are alive."
have you ever thought of the mere blessing of life? Have you ever
considered it a wonderful thing to
be alive?
what is your first thought every morning? what becomes your foucus for
the day?
sometimes it's hard to remain positive about living.
but just look around you. look at the sunshine, the flowers. the
people around you.
look at the sky, the ocean, the mountains.
listen to the birds, to the voices of people.
take it in.
and wake up to being alive.
make every moment count.
let the thoughts when you first wake up be "it's a new day! what can I
do to make a difference? how can I make someone smile today?"
think about the things you have been blessed with.
today is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in
it!
remember that you are loved. remember that every day!
remember that you are forgiven.
it's time to wake up. wake up and be alive!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Chris: My Story (and more)
Two reasons, really. First, my life was touched by an attempted suicide. She was one of my closest friends. And loneliness is all around me. I know this, and I go to a small school. Its amazing to me how in a small school we can still ignore people and make them feel lonely.
Second, because God first loved us. His love allowed me life, and it's a life I want to share with you. Yes, YOU.
Because YOU are worth it. YOU are loved. YOU have worth. YOU have value. And YOU mean the world to Him. And me.
Did you know he sent his own Son to earth, to die for our sins? For MY sins? I'm a sinner. I've sinned, I've rebelled against God. I have fallen short of the glory of God. But the beauty of this is God sent His Son to save us.
His Son was beaten, bruised, cut, stabbed, battered and bloodied. For me. For YOU.
You have worth to Him. He wants to lead you to a life of joy, of love, of pure bliss. He's also our Rock, our peace in hard times. He never said that your Christian life would be perfect. I know its not. I've dealt with hardships in my life. Hard times. But He got me through. He will never leave nor forsake us. And I will always be here for you, too.
I want YOU to know you have worth. I want to show you that, too, by reflecting God's love.
Natalie: A Little Bit About Me.
I will fade.
who am I?
I am a girl just trying to live her life. I am a failure. I am broken.
I am useless. I am ugly. I am a disaster. I am an emotional wreck. I
am ungraceful. I am at a loss for words. I am silent. I am blind. I am
unable hear. unable
to feel. unable to live.
those are the things I am, when I try to live on my own. that is who
I am when I leave God out of the picture. that is who I was before my
life was made new.
because now, I am able to stand up when I fall. I can live my life. I
am able to acomplish great things. I am beautiful because I am a
daughter of the Creator who knew me before birth.
I can speak, sing even, because I have joy and hope inside me. I am
made whole. I am sanctified. I am redeemed.
who am I?
I will fade.
but I hold on to the One who will never fade.
and while I'm living and breathing on this earth, I will share this
hope I have been given.
I have love to show, and life to live out. there are people around me
who I can reach.
I still fall sometimes. I cry when I'm upset. I laugh just a bit too
loudly. I trip walking up stairs. I run into walls. I get embarrased
about stupid things. I get shy sometimes.
I am me. I am a human being. I am a sinner. but I am a sinner saved by
grace.
and the very same grace I was saved by is the same grace that gets me
through my day. that allows me to love and care.
I am a crazy girl. I get distracted by shiny things, I like to laugh
till I can't breathe. I like to see babys smile. I like to watch the
sun set. I like to sing and play guitar and piano. I like music in
general. I like coffee shops and late night phone conversations. I
like warm hugs and evenings that are almost just too chilly. I like
quiet snowfall. and I like heavy rainfall.
I am me.
and I am here.
I'm living my life.
and sharing it with you.
so tell me your story
and I'll tell you mine.
talk to me about what's on your mind
and I willl listen to you.
I want you to know that I am here to walk this life with you. cuz I
got an invincible strength on my side.
maybe you know where that strength comes from. maybe you don't. ask
me sometime. I'd love to share it with you. And I would love to listen
to what you have to say.
who am I?
I am me.
Call to Action
What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured. - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
Hero Lyrics by Superchick
But we feel like we do when we make fun of him
Cause you want to belong do you go along
Cause his pain is the price paid for you to belong
It's not like you hate him or want him to die
But maybe he goes home and thinks suicide
Or he comes back to school with a gun at his side
And the kindness from you might have saved his life
Heroes are made when you make a choice
You could be a hero
Heroes do what's right
You could be a hero
You might save a life
You could be a hero, You could join the fight
For what's right for what's right for what's right
No one talks to her, she feels so alone
Shes in too much pain to survive on her own
The hurt she can't handle overflows to a knife
She writes on her arm, wants to give up her life
Each day she goes on is a day that she's brave,
Fighting the lie that giving up is the way,
Each moment of courage her own life she saves
When she throws the pills out a hero is made
No one talks to him about how he lives
He thinks that the choices he makes are just his
Doesn't know he's a leader with the way he behaves
And others will follow the choices he's made
He lives on the edge, he's old enough to decide
His brother who wants to be him is just nine
He can do what he wants because it's his right
The choices he makes change a nine year old's life
Little Mikey D was in the one class
Who everyday got brutally harassed
This went on for years
Until he decided that never again
Would he shed another tear
So he walked through the door
Grabbed the 44 out of his father's dresser drawer
And said I can't take life no more
And like that life can be lost
But this ain't even about that
All of us just sat back
And watch it happen
Thinkin' it's not our responsibility
To solve a problem that isn't even about me
This is our problem
This is just one of the daily scenarios
Which we choose to close our eyes
Instead of doing the right thing
If we make a choice
And be the voice
For those who won't speak up for themselves
How many lives would be saved, changed, and rearranged
Now it's our time to pick a side
So don't keep walking by
Don't wanna intervene
Cause you just wanna exist and never be seen
So let's wake up
Change the world
Our time is now
Our Mission.
you, but you don't hear it. It's right in front of you, yet you don't
see it.
it's time to WAKE UP.
what's your story? Why are you here?What's your goal? What do you live
for?
We believe there is something bigger, a greater purpose. A life far
better than this. We believe there is hope.
We believe we are broken, we are outcasts, we are seperated.
But we believe in something more.
We believe we are freed. we believe we are made new. We believe we are
redeemed.
We can't do this alone, and we realize we are not alone. We wernt
created to live life alone. We were created to reach out and share
life with other people. We were created to love.
I look around me, and I see so many lonely people every day.
I can't change the situations they face, or take away the pain they're
in. but I can give them a ray of hope in the midst of despair. And
that ray of hope can get them through another day, and maybe help them
to see things differently.
the smallest things can make the biggest difference, and maybe even
save a life. A compliment, a smile, maybe even just sitting and
listening to someone.
Here at Operation Outkast, we want to show the world what we live for.
We want to share hope and forgiveness that we have been shown. We want
to let people know that they are not alone. We want YOU to know that
you are not alone. you are surrounded by people. People who love you,
people who need you, people who know exactly how you feel and what
you're going through. People who feel lonely, even though they are
surrounded. People who have voices and want to be heard.
The mission is LOVE. It is to show people that life is worth it. The
mission is reaching out to people and letting them know you care.
And ULTIMUTELY the mission is For By Grace. It is sharing this hope
you have, hope of a life that has been made new through an ultimute
sacrifice.
The hope that has been given to us through a love that's perfect.
A hope given by God and his beautiful grace.
We are here to let you know that you don't have to go through life
alone. We are here to tell you that you are loved more than you can
immagine.
we are here to listen to you, to reach out to you. To pray for you,
and help
you in any way we can.
So tell us your story, and we'll
tell you ours. Let us know what we can do for you. we are here for
you, and we want you to know you're not alone. Life is worth it, can
you see it?
There are lonely people all around you. You see them every day. you
don't know the hard things they face. they might be fighting every day
to stay alive.
reach out to them, love them, care for them, listen to them.
you might just save a life.
that is our mission at Operation Outkast. To draw people close, and
show them love. we are a generation of hope, and hope is a beautiful
thing.